[ Haku stills under the other's touch. Because he doesn't want to lose the forehead contact they've got going on right now, sure, but also because of the gentle movement of Eiri's fingers in his hair. It's a gesture that Haku doesn't know much, but.. it's nice. It really feels nice - even aside from the general contact with Eiri that he enjoys, there's something oddly comforting about it. It reminds him a little of the part of the memories of his older brother that haven't gotten corrupted with the knowledge of what he turned into after all these years, the part that consists of smiles and gentle touches and comfort. The part of the memories that were the only thing that were able to keep him going after the first few Messiah he lost.
Except now it's something real and not just a memory, it's someone here right with him who cares about him enough to figure out what to say or do to calm Haku down and make him feel better. Someone who's with him, who's looking out for him.. his Messiah. He doesn't want to lose the contact or this moment just as much as Eiri doesn't, so that's why he doesn't move, like he's silently begging the other to not let it stop this quickly.
Not even at those words and the realisation of what they mean. Eiri's been hurting too all this time, and Haku is his Messiah. Haku wants to make him feel a little better too now he's resolved himself to the belief that he and Eiri will manage to make it together. ]
How.. [ His voice trails off for a moment, and there's something surprisingly unsure in his tone compared to the usual casual way he talks. Maybe since this is just one of those ways that his lack of experience with the world really shows, and he needs a moment to think and figure this out. Even something that might make a whole lot of sense to a normal person takes a little longer with Haku, after all. ]
I'll try to make them hurt less.
[ The non-physical ones he means, of course. He's not a doctor, he can't do anything about the physical ones he can feel on Eiri's skin, but the rest.. he wants to be able to help Eiri with them, it's just that he doesn't know how. He's never really been taught how to deal with any of these things, so there's an implication in the words that goes unspoken - so tell me how I can help.
After all-- ]
.. mine hurt less, too.
[ You'd be hard-pressed to find any decent scar on Haku's body though. There's small things - bruises from more recent missions, maybe, or a spot that's still sensitive and easily sore from where his uncle kicked him just a few times too many back when he was a kid. But it's not like Eiri's back. Haku's scars just are all purely psychological, and if the loss of every single Messiah he's had would have to be expressed in physical scars, his back would be worse off than Eiri's.
But Eiri is the one who helped with his scars, who made it all feel so much lighter and easier to bear. So it's only normal to want to help in return in some way now he's finally stopped being stubborn about pushing his Messiah away. ]
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Except now it's something real and not just a memory, it's someone here right with him who cares about him enough to figure out what to say or do to calm Haku down and make him feel better. Someone who's with him, who's looking out for him.. his Messiah. He doesn't want to lose the contact or this moment just as much as Eiri doesn't, so that's why he doesn't move, like he's silently begging the other to not let it stop this quickly.
Not even at those words and the realisation of what they mean. Eiri's been hurting too all this time, and Haku is his Messiah. Haku wants to make him feel a little better too now he's resolved himself to the belief that he and Eiri will manage to make it together. ]
How.. [ His voice trails off for a moment, and there's something surprisingly unsure in his tone compared to the usual casual way he talks. Maybe since this is just one of those ways that his lack of experience with the world really shows, and he needs a moment to think and figure this out. Even something that might make a whole lot of sense to a normal person takes a little longer with Haku, after all. ]
I'll try to make them hurt less.
[ The non-physical ones he means, of course. He's not a doctor, he can't do anything about the physical ones he can feel on Eiri's skin, but the rest.. he wants to be able to help Eiri with them, it's just that he doesn't know how. He's never really been taught how to deal with any of these things, so there's an implication in the words that goes unspoken - so tell me how I can help.
After all-- ]
.. mine hurt less, too.
[ You'd be hard-pressed to find any decent scar on Haku's body though. There's small things - bruises from more recent missions, maybe, or a spot that's still sensitive and easily sore from where his uncle kicked him just a few times too many back when he was a kid. But it's not like Eiri's back. Haku's scars just are all purely psychological, and if the loss of every single Messiah he's had would have to be expressed in physical scars, his back would be worse off than Eiri's.
But Eiri is the one who helped with his scars, who made it all feel so much lighter and easier to bear. So it's only normal to want to help in return in some way now he's finally stopped being stubborn about pushing his Messiah away. ]