[Trying isn't necessarily the same thing as doing, though, and that is something Chizuru is almost painfully aware of, even as she giggles and smiles and does her very best to act as though everything is going to be just fine, even with the knowledge that Sannan knows hanging over their heads, even with the lack of absolute certainty that her father's medicine will be less stopgap and more permanent treatment for Shinpachi's condition.
Nothing is normal, but if she can pretend like it is, and he can pretend like it is, maybe soon enough they'll come to believe it.]
And I know that it will all be okay as long as you're here. [This time, her smile actually does reach her eyes.] I feel very safe with you.
[Even in situations when she probably shouldn't - when there are bullets whizzing through the air and men's dying screams ringing out, when Shinpachi's hair is snow-white and he's facing down a pureblooded demon, when Shinpachi's eyes are blood-red and he's giving in to the one craving he never wanted to have. All of those situations were the type that she should never have been at ease in.
And yet... thinking back on them, Chizuru is certain that it's Shinpachi's presence that kept her from going to pieces in each and every one.]
Um... could we stay here for a little while longer, before going back? I'd like some time to... [Let him rest, basically, but she can't say that, can she?] ...think, before we return. And, um... the kitchen could probably stand to be used. It's been a while.
I never did make you that snack at the inn... I could do it now!
[That would mean she'd have to run out to the market very quickly, but he could always rest while she did that!]
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[Trying isn't necessarily the same thing as doing, though, and that is something Chizuru is almost painfully aware of, even as she giggles and smiles and does her very best to act as though everything is going to be just fine, even with the knowledge that Sannan knows hanging over their heads, even with the lack of absolute certainty that her father's medicine will be less stopgap and more permanent treatment for Shinpachi's condition.
Nothing is normal, but if she can pretend like it is, and he can pretend like it is, maybe soon enough they'll come to believe it.]
And I know that it will all be okay as long as you're here. [This time, her smile actually does reach her eyes.] I feel very safe with you.
[Even in situations when she probably shouldn't - when there are bullets whizzing through the air and men's dying screams ringing out, when Shinpachi's hair is snow-white and he's facing down a pureblooded demon, when Shinpachi's eyes are blood-red and he's giving in to the one craving he never wanted to have. All of those situations were the type that she should never have been at ease in.
And yet... thinking back on them, Chizuru is certain that it's Shinpachi's presence that kept her from going to pieces in each and every one.]
Um... could we stay here for a little while longer, before going back? I'd like some time to... [Let him rest, basically, but she can't say that, can she?] ...think, before we return. And, um... the kitchen could probably stand to be used. It's been a while.
I never did make you that snack at the inn... I could do it now!
[That would mean she'd have to run out to the market very quickly, but he could always rest while she did that!]