[The feeling that's like a blade gutting his stomach persists as Taiki starts to talk, only this time it's like it's twisting and diving deeper into him. Especially...at the sound of his own name, and the...the happiness that's still there when Taiki says it. No outrage...no hurt, or even confused reaction aside from the other blinking up at him.
How...how is that all he has to say?
What's worse is when Taiki starts sniffling like that...because of course...of fucking course he'd catch a cold too, wouldn't he? That's exactly the kind of luck this kid has...Except, realistically, Yomotsu knows this really is good luck given the circumstances, isn't it? Horrible images flash through his mind at the thought- mostly of some of the spirits that could've come skulking through the area...that probably could've ripped Taiki to shreds if he wouldn't have even tried to run or hide.
Yomotsu's fists curl up even tighter- almost painfully so- as his body starts shaking a little more noticeably than before. Even with those dangers already past, that small sign that Taiki got sick feels like an entire new weight on his conscious- one that carries all the implications of how it could've been worse...and all because Taiki had believed him when he'd said he'd come back.
How is he supposed to believe it's really just that simple...? In his heart, he seems to know that it must be, if it's Taiki saying that...and yet...]
Stop...Just...stop spewing out your same old bullshit. You're telling me you just sat here for day. A whole day? Not moving or sleeping or eating or doing...anything...? Just...out in the open. Right here. Right where I told you to stay.
[A small, shaky breath hisses out of his mouth.]
No one could actually be that much of an idiot...No one in their right mind would actually believe all of that...!
[It's like the only thing he can think to do in this one, frantic moment...is to lash out and try to hurt Taiki. Maybe that'd be easier to deal with, somehow...to see that Taiki is upset with him instead of just...happy. Happy to see him. But even as he spouts out the words, his chest twists up into painful knots- enough that he staggers a little at the thought of it actually hurting Taiki like it was supposed to.
Even though his words don't sound convincing to his own ears...if Taiki took his promise to come back at face value, he'd probably do the same here...wouldn't he?
Yomotsu moves one hand to the side of his own head- like he's trying to physically get a grip on the thought's that're rampaging through his mind. But all he can hear is his own heart pounding in his chest- faster and faster- and leaving his whole body feeling weak, and fragile.]
N...no one....no one could...
[His head bows down a little as he talks this time- hair falling over his eyes...and it looks like he might just collapse onto the ground at any moment.]
no subject
How...how is that all he has to say?
What's worse is when Taiki starts sniffling like that...because of course...of fucking course he'd catch a cold too, wouldn't he? That's exactly the kind of luck this kid has...Except, realistically, Yomotsu knows this really is good luck given the circumstances, isn't it? Horrible images flash through his mind at the thought- mostly of some of the spirits that could've come skulking through the area...that probably could've ripped Taiki to shreds if he wouldn't have even tried to run or hide.
Yomotsu's fists curl up even tighter- almost painfully so- as his body starts shaking a little more noticeably than before. Even with those dangers already past, that small sign that Taiki got sick feels like an entire new weight on his conscious- one that carries all the implications of how it could've been worse...and all because Taiki had believed him when he'd said he'd come back.
How is he supposed to believe it's really just that simple...? In his heart, he seems to know that it must be, if it's Taiki saying that...and yet...]
Stop...Just...stop spewing out your same old bullshit. You're telling me you just sat here for day. A whole day? Not moving or sleeping or eating or doing...anything...? Just...out in the open. Right here. Right where I told you to stay.
[A small, shaky breath hisses out of his mouth.]
No one could actually be that much of an idiot...No one in their right mind would actually believe all of that...!
[It's like the only thing he can think to do in this one, frantic moment...is to lash out and try to hurt Taiki. Maybe that'd be easier to deal with, somehow...to see that Taiki is upset with him instead of just...happy. Happy to see him. But even as he spouts out the words, his chest twists up into painful knots- enough that he staggers a little at the thought of it actually hurting Taiki like it was supposed to.
Even though his words don't sound convincing to his own ears...if Taiki took his promise to come back at face value, he'd probably do the same here...wouldn't he?
Yomotsu moves one hand to the side of his own head- like he's trying to physically get a grip on the thought's that're rampaging through his mind. But all he can hear is his own heart pounding in his chest- faster and faster- and leaving his whole body feeling weak, and fragile.]
N...no one....no one could...
[His head bows down a little as he talks this time- hair falling over his eyes...and it looks like he might just collapse onto the ground at any moment.]