[ Jeongmin finds himself holding his breath as Yunyeol takes off his shirt. It's not as if the other has never seen him naked before - he knows Yunyeol has seen that up close enough times, all those times when he was too weak to even dress himself or take a proper bath. But despite the fact that there's really nothing new here about his body, he still can't help but feel a little nervous.
After all, his body is... well, it's not that great, is it? His skin is so pale from how much time he has to spend inside due to his illness that it makes him feel like a ghost sometimes when he looks into the mirror. He's pretty skinny and frail-looking, and being left without his clothes always makes him feel incredibly vulnerable. It's not that he doesn't trust Yunyeol - otherwise they wouldn't be in this position to begin with, he knows Yunyeol is incredibly loyal and gentle - but still letting Yunyeol see this, see his pale skin marred by scars from surgeries they tried on him for his illness in the past... He feels a little bad letting the other see just how terrible he looks, no matter whether it's during a moment Yunyeol is helping him or a moment when they're doing... well, this.
His heart starts pounding more rapidly in his chest with the fear that the other might find him repulsive. It's not like Yunyeol could ever say it even if he thought it, right? He couldn't just say that to the person that owns him. So those thoughts could be there, and Jeongmin would never even know about it..
But the touch on his skin is thankfully very distracting. Yunyeol's hands feel so good and warm on his bare skin, and the kisses are so sweet and gentle that he doesn't ever want this to stop. His body usually makes him feel so terrible, and this is one of the first times that it has ever made him feel anything close to good.
His breaths are long, but start to turn more shakey the more the other kisses and touches him. ]
Yunyeol...
[ Tell me you love me. Tell me I'm not just some pathetic guy you have to take care of. Tell me---
All things that go around in his head, but that he could never say since it'd be an absolute order if he did voice them out loud, and forced answers would be even worse than Yunyeol voicing the sentiments Jeongmin sometimes fears the other holds. ]
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After all, his body is... well, it's not that great, is it? His skin is so pale from how much time he has to spend inside due to his illness that it makes him feel like a ghost sometimes when he looks into the mirror. He's pretty skinny and frail-looking, and being left without his clothes always makes him feel incredibly vulnerable. It's not that he doesn't trust Yunyeol - otherwise they wouldn't be in this position to begin with, he knows Yunyeol is incredibly loyal and gentle - but still letting Yunyeol see this, see his pale skin marred by scars from surgeries they tried on him for his illness in the past... He feels a little bad letting the other see just how terrible he looks, no matter whether it's during a moment Yunyeol is helping him or a moment when they're doing... well, this.
His heart starts pounding more rapidly in his chest with the fear that the other might find him repulsive. It's not like Yunyeol could ever say it even if he thought it, right? He couldn't just say that to the person that owns him. So those thoughts could be there, and Jeongmin would never even know about it..
But the touch on his skin is thankfully very distracting. Yunyeol's hands feel so good and warm on his bare skin, and the kisses are so sweet and gentle that he doesn't ever want this to stop. His body usually makes him feel so terrible, and this is one of the first times that it has ever made him feel anything close to good.
His breaths are long, but start to turn more shakey the more the other kisses and touches him. ]
Yunyeol...
[ Tell me you love me. Tell me I'm not just some pathetic guy you have to take care of. Tell me---
All things that go around in his head, but that he could never say since it'd be an absolute order if he did voice them out loud, and forced answers would be even worse than Yunyeol voicing the sentiments Jeongmin sometimes fears the other holds. ]