[Minhwan's questions- whether they're meant to be addressed to him or not- still hang in the air...and...surprisingly enough, dig up some feelings of fear that'd been buried down in his heart.
There've already been people in his life who were...at least, on paper...supposed to care if something happened to him...but didn't.
With Minhwan...the question's never come up before- there hasn't been a situation that's put Sejoon at risk at all since they've been together. But somewhat unconsciously, he'd been bracing himself for the fact that...there's a good chance Minhwan probably wouldn't care much about him. He already knows...how apathetic Minhwan can be about things most people would care about. It always...always comes back to apathy...and Sejoon can't even stand that word.
It's a strange realization to have...considering how much this guy drives him nuts usually. Why should it bother him, if Minhwan didn't end up caring...? It's already obvious enough that Minhwan doesn't handle emotions the same way most people do...Is it naive of him to think Minhwan might feel different for his own boyfriend...?
...Maybe it hurts because...Sejoon knows he can't help but care. It's why he's here, isn't it...? He would have brought any other classmate to the infirmary, but...the more he thinks about it, the more he realizes he wouldn't have worried this much. Or stayed this long. No matter what kind of guy Minhwan is, against all odds...he's still one of the very few people Sejoon's chosen to let in, and get a little bit closer. To bring him into a more intimate part of Sejoon's life, and to show sides of himself he never has before. Not to anyone else.
And it's hard- to know that he cares, even that much, and think again about how it might be unrequited.
But...maybe...just, maybe...from the way Minhwan's acting? Maybe he really doesn't have to worry about it all much. Sejoon only hopes that isn't just wishful thinking on his part. For now, he closes his eyes and soaks in the feeling of the other boy softly touching his lips...realizing that it feels strangely soothing.]
I'd like to find that out too, someday...
[He speaks in a slow, hushed tone- letting his lips move gently against the fingertips pressing against them.
The question itself still- would Minhwan worry?- brings out a sense of vulnerability in Sejoon...but more importantly, there's hopefulness now too. And he finds himself...very grateful that Minhwan had asked something like that on his own too.]
[ At least Minhwan doesn't miss that there's something a little weird about Sejoon's voice when he replies. It isn't just a normal casual tone, and even in Sejoon's expression there's a hint of something else, even though Minhwan can't fully place it.. which is probably not as much as a result of the wound on Minhwan's head as much as it's just him not being good at this whole emotions thing when it comes down to it.
He shifts a little from where he's lying on Sejoon - not moving off the other boy, but at least making sure he can look at the other a little more properly, as if he'll be able to understand him more that way. There's some of Sejoon's emotions that Minhwan can understand, most of them having to do with anger or annoyance.. but when it comes to less aggressive emotions, he's completely lost. ]
Would you feel bad if I didn't?
[ Some other people might take it as Minhwan being Minhwan - teasing by stating the obvious. Of course anyone would feel bad at their lover not worrying about them when something bad happens to them, after all. But to Minhwan nothing is that simple.. no matter how smart he is, he just can't grasp even the most basic things about emotions. He mostly sounds just curious, at least, like he's not out to tease Sejoon by asking that. Even if it ends up being a little blunt and straightforward.. but then again, that is very much like Minhwan too.
He pulls his hand back to himself, off Sejoon's lips, but keeps staring at the other. ]
I wouldn't have been upset if you didn't worry about me, you know. [ Not that it means Sejoon doesn't mean anything to him. He likes Sejoon, he likes being around him -- hell, for all the flirting around he does with just about everyone, he still likes being Sejoon's boyfriend. If he had to pick one person to be in a relationship with, it'd be Sejoon. Sejoon is special to Minhwan in Minhwan's own dumb unique emotionally dumb way, but it's just that Minhwan doesn't know what it's like to feel bad. He never has. He can't imagine suddenly feeling that way just because Sejoon didn't freak out over him falling down the stairs. ] If you weren't here, I just would have gotten up and harassed you while you were in class.
[ It's a sign of how little it would bother him if Sejoon didn't worry. Sure, it isn't the best idea to immediately get up and walk around with his kind of injury, but has that ever stopped Minhwan? Of course it wouldn't. Harassing Sejoon would be much more fun than lying around here bored by himself on this bed. ]
[Sejoon, at least, can tell that Minhwan isn't teasing him this time around. It's not the sort of thing he'd put past Minhwan...but this isn't a normal circumstance for either of them. So even though the question itself is a strange one, he can at least take all of this seriously.
But Minhwan saying he wouldn't have been upset...that Sejoon can't say he's very surprised about. Maybe Minhwan would want the attention, sure...but he wouldn't be angry if Sejoon didn't show up, or sad. Which...doesn't quite sit right with him, even though he was expecting it. The thought makes him feel a little strange...because he sure knows that Minhwan wants him (considering he'd get off his infirmary bed to go to class)...and it's not like he legitimately wants Minhwan to get upset...but...maybe it would just feel nice to know that Minhwan would miss him for something more than just a source of attention. Or maybe it's because...]
Yeah...It would bother me. I don't think I'd feel very happy if I was lying here...and I knew you were off somewhere in class. And you weren't going to come.
[And he'd just be left there by himself.
It's one of the first times he's ever willingly admitted that something Minhwan could do would actually get to him, in any way. That's why his voice still sounds softer than usual...and that's why he moves his hand to gently smooth Minhwan's bangs out of his face- letting himself get a better look at the other boy too.
Even after, for all intents and purposes, he made himself vulnerable in front of Minhwan...he doesn't feel bad about it. As much as the other boy likes to tease him, even Sejoon knows well enough that he'd never do anything to intentionally hurt him that way.
Still...this is something he knows he has a chance to work on fixing...and making Minhwan realize that Sejoon really does care about him as more than just a sex partner, or a school rival. He still calls him his boyfriend for a reason, after all...]
But like I already told you anyway- I'd be here if this happens again...so don't roll out of any infirmary beds, ok? Even if I wasn't here right when you woke up, I'd be on my way.
[ The last statement is comforting.. in a weird way, though. It's not like Minhwan needs the reassurance, after all. He just said as much. He wouldn't be upset if Sejoon didn't show up, so if he isn't upset, then there's nothing to comfort. But even so, the statement does make him feel a little oddly warm.. maybe it's since it's at least a reassurance that Sejoon will always come to give him attention, no matter what. That he'll show up to give him attention even if he isn't there yet. And that is an idea that Minhwan sure can get behind, and one that makes him grin a little again - although there's not as much of an edge behind it as there usually might be. Even though it would be easy to blame it on Minhwan's head wound maybe still causing him to be light-headed.
He lets his head drops for a moment to lean it against Sejoon's chest again, grinning against the other. It's almost a little oddly giddy (but in that subdued Minhwan sort of way). He just loves the thought of Sejoon going out of his way to give him attention. Sejoon coming to fuss over him when stuff like this happens.. it's something he never could have imagined when he started something with the other guy to begin with, but he's glad for it all the same.
And at least Sejoon is right on another count - Minhwan would never consciously want to hurt the other. Sure, he might be an asshole most of the time, but a lot of it has to do with just being unable to understand how most normal people's emotions work. If Sejoon directly says that something would upset him as much as he is saying now, then Minhwan can at least listen to that. He's not a totally rotten boyfriend, although he hasn't exactly proven as much yet until this point.
At least he speaks up again the moment he lifts his head to look at the other once more. ]
Then I'll be there too if it'd happen to you. [ "So you won't get sad".. he doesn't say it explicitly, and it's hard to tell if it's in there that way directly, but there's still a hint of it in the way he says it. Sejoon can translate Minhwan speak well enough in his head to probably catch onto it anyway. He's trying, in his own dumb emotionally challenged way. ]
Or are you saying you would roll out of an infirmary bed without waiting for me first, Sejoonie?
[ See, it's Minhwan, so of course he immediately has to follow it up with something like that, grinning a little the entire time. ]
[Sejoon can't say he ever imagined them in a situation like this either, even when they first agreed to start dating. But no matter what he thinks of Minhwan normally, he never wants the other to get hurt...And besides, it's impossible for him to spend so much time with the other, and not grow closer to him - even if it happens in strange ways.
He already gets the sense that things will be different between them after today. Not everything...he knows Minhwan will still drive him absolutely crazy, he knows he'll still put everything he has into beating him, he knows the other guy will still be able to bring out that more intense side of him...But even with Minhwan's usual teasing, things are already different too- right here, right now. This is already the first time they've been softer with each other...And he definitely knows he won't be able to stop fussing for a while yet.
Either way, Minhwan still gets all the attention he wants from Sejoon. And...maybe it's just that he's still worried, or maybe it's from a few of the things Minhwan had said, but...Sejoon actually feels...like he's glad to give it to him too.
That feeling only got stronger when Minhwan said he'd be there for Sejoon too...because he does know the other guy well enough to pick up on the meaning there. He's...not surprised to realize that Minhwan really would do something like this, but it's still comforting all the same. Maybe because Sejoon was right...that Minhwan really isn't the sort of person who would want to hurt him. And the sense of trust that it instills in Sejoon is surprising.
Sejoon manages a grin at Minhwan's statement- like the other's giddiness is spreading into him. He tilts his head down to press it very gently against the other's.]
I guess I could wait for you. You going to bring me flowers too?
[He rolls his eyes- already guessing what the other might say next...but he's still smiling when he says it.]
And before you even say anything, I didn't have time. I'll have to get you some later.
[It's hard to tell if he's joking or not, although he can honestly say he wouldn't actually mind getting Minhwan a bouquet of "get well soon" flowers.
But the smile does fade from his face as he starts to grow a little more serious again. He cups Minhwan's cheek after a small moment of quiet- keeping his face in a gentle hold as he leans his head down again and closes his eyes. His hand tilts the other's head up carefully...only to get his attention, and let him know he is being serious now.]
[ See, how can his odd giddiness go away when Sejoon just keeps saying stuff like that? Because Minhwan sure was about to make a joke that would only be half an actual joke (because getting flowers from Sejoon would be funny as hell, and it's another form of getting attention that Minhwan will gladly soak up), but before he does it, Sejoon already half-jokes back that he'll get him some later.
It's a slightly strange thought, the idea that he can just rely on Sejoon for stuff like this. That Sejoon will understand what he needs - attention, mostly, in its many forms - and give it to him before Minhwan even has to ask for it somehow. Minhwan is so used to just practically dragging it out of other people by harassing him to death that the idea never occurred to him that there'd be someone who'd just give it to him this easily. Voluntarily. Not that it's a bad thing, it's definitely a great thing, but it's just.. well. New.
What's also new is Sejoon seeming so serious about this. Minhwan can't ignore him when the other tilts his head a little like that to make him look at him.. and even though Minhwan sucks at emotions, he can tell it's not a joke. It's not the usual, not something like Sejoon being frustrated with him. He's happy, and he's genuinely thanking him.
.. Definitely new. But something Minhwan will happily get used to, anyway. ]
Does it really mean that much to you?
[ Not that he can help speaking up again.. It's Minhwan, after all. He can never shut up, and he's always incredibly straightforward and honest to a point that it's just blunt - just because of the way his brain works. He can't not be upfront about this stuff, even when it concerns him not understanding normal small social things like people being able to genuinely thank him this happily for something. ]
Have I ever refused you something..? [ He tilts his head just a tiny bit - just the bit that Sejoon's grip allows.
Okay, so he's definitely refused Sejoon some things before. Mostly things that involves Sejoon saying something along the lines of no, Minhwan and Minhwan's response was definitely a yes, Minhwan as he continued to harass the other.. but it's not like he's ever said no when Sejoon asked him to do something other than to stop. Even if Sejoon had asked for sappier stuff before, he would have done it. After Disney villain laughing, sure, but Minhwan is an incredibly easy guy. Hell, he didn't even start topping Sejoon until the other asked for it. ]
If you want something, then just ask me. I'll do it.
[ And although there's no real weight in his tone - it just seems natural to Minhwan, really - he means it. He would, because what Sejoon thinks is true.. he doesn't want to seriously hurt the other. ]
[It's hard not to figure out that attention is exactly what Minhwan wants, no matter what form that attention may take...which is definitely worrisome. And it's true enough that sometimes Minhwan does have to drag that attention out of him. But not for a situation like this one...there's no pulling teeth here. It'd been easy enough to guess that if he made a comment about flowers, Minhwan would make a comment about Sejoon getting them for him. And honestly...why not? His boyfriend fell on his head, Sejoon can at least give him a little extra attention right now, even without giving him a hard time.
Honestly, it's also not surprising that Minhwan asks him if it really means that much to him. Especially given how Minhwan's reacted to all of this so far.
What does catch him by surprise this time, is Minhwan saying that Sejoon can ask him for anything he wants. And even though they both know Minhwan has refused some "no"s from Sejoon before...Honestly- looking at him now, he can believe what Minhwan's saying. Sejoon himself hasn't had many situations where he's wanted to ask anything from the other, at least not in all seriousness. But Minhwan really is the kind of guy who would just...do it, isn't he? If Sejoon really needed something. And the casualness to his answer only feels reassuring too.
His arm gently wraps around Minhwan's head...and Sejoon lets out a small breath- smiling softly as he does.]
Yeah...I will.
[Even though he's sure a lot of the things he'd ask for could earn some teasing along with it.
It's another strange realization that he can rely on Minhwan too...but he is always upfront about everything. And Sejoon can't imagine that now would be any different.]
You can do the same, you know. If you ever really need something.
[And Minhwan will probably ask for it anyway, won't he...? But Sejoon can't help but return that offer. And he never could refuse the other anything important.]
[ Honestly, it's just part of dealing with Minhwan. Even though he's not nearly as bad as a guy as he might seem, it's true that he's still completely obnoxious and has a hard time understanding how empathy is supposed to work. Or understanding social situations. Which means he will do absolutely anything for the people he likes, but it will definitely come with teasing, that's for sure.
But hey, with Minhwan people are going to endure teasing either way when they're around him, so they might as well ask for something and at least get something out of it that way.
Even Sejoon's statement here is an opportunity for more teasing, no matter how the other might be meant it. At the very sound of it Minhwan can't help but widely grin against the other in his current position, the thoughts immediately popping up in his head. He's never had trouble thinking of stuff to ask from Sejoon, if not just because he's constantly very attention hungry. ]
No matter what it is? [ Not that Sejoon said that much, but Minhwan is feeling like it's implied anyway since Minhwan himself said as much. And sure, his boyfriend did say "really need something," but it's not as if he hasn't had trouble differentiating what's truly important and what's not in the past. Minhwan's brain works in strange ways, and considers some absolutely stupid stuff of the utmost importance.
It's why he still stupidly grins, making sure he can at least look at Sejoon to soak in every moment of the other's reaction to what he's about to say - it's only natural when it's Minhwan. ]
Even if I texted you in the middle of class to come out and fuck me in some broom closet here?
[ Because when he thinks of stuff he really wants, of course that's where his mind goes to first - no matter how relatively soft this moment might be between the two of them. ]
[Of course Sejoon let's his guard down long enough to really get emotional with Minhwan...to start opening his heart for a little bit...and then he gets a reaction like that. He should've seen it coming a mile away. It doesn't actually upset him or anything though, it just makes him roll his eyes in a more lighthearted exasperated way than usual.
This sure as hell is a good example of Minhwan's usual obnoxious behavior, but it doesn't feel like it has as much bite to it now. Maybe it's that Sejoon's already feeling softer from all of this, or maybe it's just that he's finally started getting used to the way the other guy is...but either way, it feels easier to just do a bit of back and forth with him. Besides, given everything that's happened today...he really should know better by now- that the "really" would've flown right over Minhwan's head, and the other guy would figure he COULD actually ask for anything.]
Oh my god...really?
[But of course he knows Minhwan's serious. If there's anything he's tried to get out of Sejoon this whole time, it's for them to fuck in school, and apparently...he's not even deterred from asking about that in an intimate moment in the infirmary together. Sejoon laughs a little at least and shakes his head after he says that- but he doesn't seem too flustered otherwise. Still pretty different from a usual response, all things considered.]
You're really trying to flunk us both out of school, aren't you? Wouldn't you miss fighting over the top spot?
[There's no way he's giving an absolute "yes" to a request like that. Even if someday he feels like giving in to something like that, he definitely doesn't right now. But he still doesn't want to deter Minhwan from thinking he can actually ask for something he wants...because now he's worried if he says no to one thing, Minhwan might not take him seriously. He'll have to work on that a bit, huh?]
[ Minhwan doesn't even seem bothered that the other isn't flustered at what he's saying. Not that he's usually easily bothered, but still - there's not even a reason for him to be bothered by it to begin with. For one, he likes how Sejoon laughs a little at it instead, if not just since it makes Minhwan feel like somehow Sejoon has really given in a little... Even if it's not really about the sex at school. It more just does give Minhwan the impression that he could ask for anything from the other - a thought that's a little weird, but definitely not in a bad way.
And secondly.. well, it's not like he meant to rile up Sejoon for once. He genuinely didn't intent to ruin the atmosphere they've got going on here - it's just that Minhwan sucks at telling the mood in any situation. He's just the kind of moron that will bring up something completely inappropriate without it seeming weird to him in the moment. Even while he's lying here propped up against Sejoon, much closer and softer than they have ever been before.
So he still smiles. It's definitely a grinny smile, considering how Minhwan works, but there's a genuine kind of joy and almost childish giddiness behind the expression. It's not that he doesn't like Sejoon getting mad at him, it was funny as hell plenty of times before, but he likes this too somehow. Sejoon just laughing as he pokes back at him a little, seeming exasperated yet amused at the same time.
It's nice. Minhwan could definitely get used to this. ]
Who says I'd have to miss it? We can just continue where we left off at another school. [ It's said with a surprising amount of genuinity.. because it really doesn't bother Minhwan that something like that might get him kicked off school. There's no way something like consequences could ever get through that deeply to Minhwan - instead the thought of it is just funny. Sejoon going through all the schools in the city, flunking out of them one by one, fighting for the top spot the whole time...
He laughs, even if it's not as over the top as his usual one due to the fact that he is still wounded, despite how he's acting. ]
Are you saying you think there's anyone else at another school who could take it instead?
[ No way, that's his and Sejoon's battle. It couldn't be as much fun with anyone else, Minhwan is convinced of that much. ]
[There's no way Sejoon's letting them get flunked out of school...no matter how easily Minhwan can think about that sort of scenario, it's different for him. Mostly just because he's the one who actually cares about school, and his grades and all that. Flunking out wouldn't exactly look great for someone who wants a career in education, would it? Even if he went back to another school and still did great.
Not that he's worried about that happening...But even if it did happen, he couldn't imagine things going any other way than they are now with Minhwan. It's weird how much of a normal everyday thing this has turned into for him- like he can't imagine going through the rest of school without battling for the top spot with the other guy. It'd just feel weird, wouldn't it...? Even though there were plenty of years without this rivalry before either of them ever met.
In a way...it's actually kind of weirdly comforting to here that, in the worst case scenario (worst case scenario to Sejoon meaning he gets kicked out of school for some reason), Minhwan would apparently still follow him on to the next school. It's one thing that Sejoon doesn't have to worry about losing...it's one thing that'll stay the same, no matter what he does. And he actually believes Minhwan would follow through on something like that- the guy's followed him in crazy enough ways so far...why would he stop there?]
What, so we'd just pick right up where we left off? Or...then again, who knows? Maybe you'll be trying to get number one back from me by then.
[For some reason, he can't stop himself from smiling while he's seeing Minhwan be all grinny like that. He knows very well that a pretty similar expression could still rile him up just as easily...but no matter whether Minhwan can or can't read the mood right now, he's not doing anything right now except making Sejoon feel good.
He laughs a little and leans over to give Minhwan's forehead another small, soft kiss...it just feels right for some reason, no matter how weird the thought of that is.]
I think if we're going to stay on the same path, we might as well stay in the same school too.
[ There's definitely a feeling of satisfaction when he doesn't hear Sejoon mentioning the possibility of letting anyone else fight with him for the top spot. Minhwan sure doesn't mind Sejoon implying that he'll have the top spot and Minhwan will have to steal it from him - mostly since the spot never really mattered to Minhwan the way it did to Sejoon, the only reason he went along with the rivalry was purely for Sejoon's reactions and all the attention he gave to him. But even though Minhwan is someone who has never felt jealousy in his life before and would never rip Sejoon away from someone else if he did find someone else - he still likes things the way they are right now, and he's glad to keep them like this.
Even with these new things between them right now today. Switching it up is only fun, so Minhwan welcomes even the soft kisses like the one Sejoon plants on his forehead, smiling like he isn't still wounded in the head from his fall earlier. ]
Do you like this school that much, Sejoonie?
[ Not that Minhwan dislikes this school. Sejoon is here, and his sister is, and his best friend is, and other fun people-- but he's less attached to things, has less trouble leaving things behind. Even if he went to another school, he could just contact all of those people outside of school. ]
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There've already been people in his life who were...at least, on paper...supposed to care if something happened to him...but didn't.
With Minhwan...the question's never come up before- there hasn't been a situation that's put Sejoon at risk at all since they've been together. But somewhat unconsciously, he'd been bracing himself for the fact that...there's a good chance Minhwan probably wouldn't care much about him. He already knows...how apathetic Minhwan can be about things most people would care about. It always...always comes back to apathy...and Sejoon can't even stand that word.
It's a strange realization to have...considering how much this guy drives him nuts usually. Why should it bother him, if Minhwan didn't end up caring...? It's already obvious enough that Minhwan doesn't handle emotions the same way most people do...Is it naive of him to think Minhwan might feel different for his own boyfriend...?
...Maybe it hurts because...Sejoon knows he can't help but care. It's why he's here, isn't it...? He would have brought any other classmate to the infirmary, but...the more he thinks about it, the more he realizes he wouldn't have worried this much. Or stayed this long. No matter what kind of guy Minhwan is, against all odds...he's still one of the very few people Sejoon's chosen to let in, and get a little bit closer. To bring him into a more intimate part of Sejoon's life, and to show sides of himself he never has before. Not to anyone else.
And it's hard- to know that he cares, even that much, and think again about how it might be unrequited.
But...maybe...just, maybe...from the way Minhwan's acting? Maybe he really doesn't have to worry about it all much. Sejoon only hopes that isn't just wishful thinking on his part. For now, he closes his eyes and soaks in the feeling of the other boy softly touching his lips...realizing that it feels strangely soothing.]
I'd like to find that out too, someday...
[He speaks in a slow, hushed tone- letting his lips move gently against the fingertips pressing against them.
The question itself still- would Minhwan worry?- brings out a sense of vulnerability in Sejoon...but more importantly, there's hopefulness now too. And he finds himself...very grateful that Minhwan had asked something like that on his own too.]
no subject
He shifts a little from where he's lying on Sejoon - not moving off the other boy, but at least making sure he can look at the other a little more properly, as if he'll be able to understand him more that way. There's some of Sejoon's emotions that Minhwan can understand, most of them having to do with anger or annoyance.. but when it comes to less aggressive emotions, he's completely lost. ]
Would you feel bad if I didn't?
[ Some other people might take it as Minhwan being Minhwan - teasing by stating the obvious. Of course anyone would feel bad at their lover not worrying about them when something bad happens to them, after all. But to Minhwan nothing is that simple.. no matter how smart he is, he just can't grasp even the most basic things about emotions. He mostly sounds just curious, at least, like he's not out to tease Sejoon by asking that. Even if it ends up being a little blunt and straightforward.. but then again, that is very much like Minhwan too.
He pulls his hand back to himself, off Sejoon's lips, but keeps staring at the other. ]
I wouldn't have been upset if you didn't worry about me, you know. [ Not that it means Sejoon doesn't mean anything to him. He likes Sejoon, he likes being around him -- hell, for all the flirting around he does with just about everyone, he still likes being Sejoon's boyfriend. If he had to pick one person to be in a relationship with, it'd be Sejoon. Sejoon is special to Minhwan in Minhwan's own dumb unique emotionally dumb way, but it's just that Minhwan doesn't know what it's like to feel bad. He never has. He can't imagine suddenly feeling that way just because Sejoon didn't freak out over him falling down the stairs. ] If you weren't here, I just would have gotten up and harassed you while you were in class.
[ It's a sign of how little it would bother him if Sejoon didn't worry. Sure, it isn't the best idea to immediately get up and walk around with his kind of injury, but has that ever stopped Minhwan? Of course it wouldn't. Harassing Sejoon would be much more fun than lying around here bored by himself on this bed. ]
no subject
But Minhwan saying he wouldn't have been upset...that Sejoon can't say he's very surprised about. Maybe Minhwan would want the attention, sure...but he wouldn't be angry if Sejoon didn't show up, or sad. Which...doesn't quite sit right with him, even though he was expecting it. The thought makes him feel a little strange...because he sure knows that Minhwan wants him (considering he'd get off his infirmary bed to go to class)...and it's not like he legitimately wants Minhwan to get upset...but...maybe it would just feel nice to know that Minhwan would miss him for something more than just a source of attention. Or maybe it's because...]
Yeah...It would bother me. I don't think I'd feel very happy if I was lying here...and I knew you were off somewhere in class. And you weren't going to come.
[And he'd just be left there by himself.
It's one of the first times he's ever willingly admitted that something Minhwan could do would actually get to him, in any way. That's why his voice still sounds softer than usual...and that's why he moves his hand to gently smooth Minhwan's bangs out of his face- letting himself get a better look at the other boy too.
Even after, for all intents and purposes, he made himself vulnerable in front of Minhwan...he doesn't feel bad about it. As much as the other boy likes to tease him, even Sejoon knows well enough that he'd never do anything to intentionally hurt him that way.
Still...this is something he knows he has a chance to work on fixing...and making Minhwan realize that Sejoon really does care about him as more than just a sex partner, or a school rival. He still calls him his boyfriend for a reason, after all...]
But like I already told you anyway- I'd be here if this happens again...so don't roll out of any infirmary beds, ok? Even if I wasn't here right when you woke up, I'd be on my way.
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He lets his head drops for a moment to lean it against Sejoon's chest again, grinning against the other. It's almost a little oddly giddy (but in that subdued Minhwan sort of way). He just loves the thought of Sejoon going out of his way to give him attention. Sejoon coming to fuss over him when stuff like this happens.. it's something he never could have imagined when he started something with the other guy to begin with, but he's glad for it all the same.
And at least Sejoon is right on another count - Minhwan would never consciously want to hurt the other. Sure, he might be an asshole most of the time, but a lot of it has to do with just being unable to understand how most normal people's emotions work. If Sejoon directly says that something would upset him as much as he is saying now, then Minhwan can at least listen to that. He's not a totally rotten boyfriend, although he hasn't exactly proven as much yet until this point.
At least he speaks up again the moment he lifts his head to look at the other once more. ]
Then I'll be there too if it'd happen to you. [ "So you won't get sad".. he doesn't say it explicitly, and it's hard to tell if it's in there that way directly, but there's still a hint of it in the way he says it. Sejoon can translate Minhwan speak well enough in his head to probably catch onto it anyway. He's trying, in his own dumb emotionally challenged way. ]
Or are you saying you would roll out of an infirmary bed without waiting for me first, Sejoonie?
[ See, it's Minhwan, so of course he immediately has to follow it up with something like that, grinning a little the entire time. ]
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He already gets the sense that things will be different between them after today. Not everything...he knows Minhwan will still drive him absolutely crazy, he knows he'll still put everything he has into beating him, he knows the other guy will still be able to bring out that more intense side of him...But even with Minhwan's usual teasing, things are already different too- right here, right now. This is already the first time they've been softer with each other...And he definitely knows he won't be able to stop fussing for a while yet.
Either way, Minhwan still gets all the attention he wants from Sejoon. And...maybe it's just that he's still worried, or maybe it's from a few of the things Minhwan had said, but...Sejoon actually feels...like he's glad to give it to him too.
That feeling only got stronger when Minhwan said he'd be there for Sejoon too...because he does know the other guy well enough to pick up on the meaning there. He's...not surprised to realize that Minhwan really would do something like this, but it's still comforting all the same. Maybe because Sejoon was right...that Minhwan really isn't the sort of person who would want to hurt him. And the sense of trust that it instills in Sejoon is surprising.
Sejoon manages a grin at Minhwan's statement- like the other's giddiness is spreading into him. He tilts his head down to press it very gently against the other's.]
I guess I could wait for you. You going to bring me flowers too?
[He rolls his eyes- already guessing what the other might say next...but he's still smiling when he says it.]
And before you even say anything, I didn't have time. I'll have to get you some later.
[It's hard to tell if he's joking or not, although he can honestly say he wouldn't actually mind getting Minhwan a bouquet of "get well soon" flowers.
But the smile does fade from his face as he starts to grow a little more serious again. He cups Minhwan's cheek after a small moment of quiet- keeping his face in a gentle hold as he leans his head down again and closes his eyes. His hand tilts the other's head up carefully...only to get his attention, and let him know he is being serious now.]
Thank you, though...really...
["For saying that you'd come."]
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It's a slightly strange thought, the idea that he can just rely on Sejoon for stuff like this. That Sejoon will understand what he needs - attention, mostly, in its many forms - and give it to him before Minhwan even has to ask for it somehow. Minhwan is so used to just practically dragging it out of other people by harassing him to death that the idea never occurred to him that there'd be someone who'd just give it to him this easily. Voluntarily. Not that it's a bad thing, it's definitely a great thing, but it's just.. well. New.
What's also new is Sejoon seeming so serious about this. Minhwan can't ignore him when the other tilts his head a little like that to make him look at him.. and even though Minhwan sucks at emotions, he can tell it's not a joke. It's not the usual, not something like Sejoon being frustrated with him. He's happy, and he's genuinely thanking him.
.. Definitely new. But something Minhwan will happily get used to, anyway. ]
Does it really mean that much to you?
[ Not that he can help speaking up again.. It's Minhwan, after all. He can never shut up, and he's always incredibly straightforward and honest to a point that it's just blunt - just because of the way his brain works. He can't not be upfront about this stuff, even when it concerns him not understanding normal small social things like people being able to genuinely thank him this happily for something. ]
Have I ever refused you something..? [ He tilts his head just a tiny bit - just the bit that Sejoon's grip allows.
Okay, so he's definitely refused Sejoon some things before. Mostly things that involves Sejoon saying something along the lines of no, Minhwan and Minhwan's response was definitely a yes, Minhwan as he continued to harass the other.. but it's not like he's ever said no when Sejoon asked him to do something other than to stop. Even if Sejoon had asked for sappier stuff before, he would have done it. After Disney villain laughing, sure, but Minhwan is an incredibly easy guy. Hell, he didn't even start topping Sejoon until the other asked for it. ]
If you want something, then just ask me. I'll do it.
[ And although there's no real weight in his tone - it just seems natural to Minhwan, really - he means it. He would, because what Sejoon thinks is true.. he doesn't want to seriously hurt the other. ]
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Honestly, it's also not surprising that Minhwan asks him if it really means that much to him. Especially given how Minhwan's reacted to all of this so far.
What does catch him by surprise this time, is Minhwan saying that Sejoon can ask him for anything he wants. And even though they both know Minhwan has refused some "no"s from Sejoon before...Honestly- looking at him now, he can believe what Minhwan's saying. Sejoon himself hasn't had many situations where he's wanted to ask anything from the other, at least not in all seriousness. But Minhwan really is the kind of guy who would just...do it, isn't he? If Sejoon really needed something. And the casualness to his answer only feels reassuring too.
His arm gently wraps around Minhwan's head...and Sejoon lets out a small breath- smiling softly as he does.]
Yeah...I will.
[Even though he's sure a lot of the things he'd ask for could earn some teasing along with it.
It's another strange realization that he can rely on Minhwan too...but he is always upfront about everything. And Sejoon can't imagine that now would be any different.]
You can do the same, you know. If you ever really need something.
[And Minhwan will probably ask for it anyway, won't he...? But Sejoon can't help but return that offer. And he never could refuse the other anything important.]
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But hey, with Minhwan people are going to endure teasing either way when they're around him, so they might as well ask for something and at least get something out of it that way.
Even Sejoon's statement here is an opportunity for more teasing, no matter how the other might be meant it. At the very sound of it Minhwan can't help but widely grin against the other in his current position, the thoughts immediately popping up in his head. He's never had trouble thinking of stuff to ask from Sejoon, if not just because he's constantly very attention hungry. ]
No matter what it is? [ Not that Sejoon said that much, but Minhwan is feeling like it's implied anyway since Minhwan himself said as much. And sure, his boyfriend did say "really need something," but it's not as if he hasn't had trouble differentiating what's truly important and what's not in the past. Minhwan's brain works in strange ways, and considers some absolutely stupid stuff of the utmost importance.
It's why he still stupidly grins, making sure he can at least look at Sejoon to soak in every moment of the other's reaction to what he's about to say - it's only natural when it's Minhwan. ]
Even if I texted you in the middle of class to come out and fuck me in some broom closet here?
[ Because when he thinks of stuff he really wants, of course that's where his mind goes to first - no matter how relatively soft this moment might be between the two of them. ]
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This sure as hell is a good example of Minhwan's usual obnoxious behavior, but it doesn't feel like it has as much bite to it now. Maybe it's that Sejoon's already feeling softer from all of this, or maybe it's just that he's finally started getting used to the way the other guy is...but either way, it feels easier to just do a bit of back and forth with him. Besides, given everything that's happened today...he really should know better by now- that the "really" would've flown right over Minhwan's head, and the other guy would figure he COULD actually ask for anything.]
Oh my god...really?
[But of course he knows Minhwan's serious. If there's anything he's tried to get out of Sejoon this whole time, it's for them to fuck in school, and apparently...he's not even deterred from asking about that in an intimate moment in the infirmary together. Sejoon laughs a little at least and shakes his head after he says that- but he doesn't seem too flustered otherwise. Still pretty different from a usual response, all things considered.]
You're really trying to flunk us both out of school, aren't you? Wouldn't you miss fighting over the top spot?
[There's no way he's giving an absolute "yes" to a request like that. Even if someday he feels like giving in to something like that, he definitely doesn't right now. But he still doesn't want to deter Minhwan from thinking he can actually ask for something he wants...because now he's worried if he says no to one thing, Minhwan might not take him seriously. He'll have to work on that a bit, huh?]
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And secondly.. well, it's not like he meant to rile up Sejoon for once. He genuinely didn't intent to ruin the atmosphere they've got going on here - it's just that Minhwan sucks at telling the mood in any situation. He's just the kind of moron that will bring up something completely inappropriate without it seeming weird to him in the moment. Even while he's lying here propped up against Sejoon, much closer and softer than they have ever been before.
So he still smiles. It's definitely a grinny smile, considering how Minhwan works, but there's a genuine kind of joy and almost childish giddiness behind the expression. It's not that he doesn't like Sejoon getting mad at him, it was funny as hell plenty of times before, but he likes this too somehow. Sejoon just laughing as he pokes back at him a little, seeming exasperated yet amused at the same time.
It's nice. Minhwan could definitely get used to this. ]
Who says I'd have to miss it? We can just continue where we left off at another school. [ It's said with a surprising amount of genuinity.. because it really doesn't bother Minhwan that something like that might get him kicked off school. There's no way something like consequences could ever get through that deeply to Minhwan - instead the thought of it is just funny. Sejoon going through all the schools in the city, flunking out of them one by one, fighting for the top spot the whole time...
He laughs, even if it's not as over the top as his usual one due to the fact that he is still wounded, despite how he's acting. ]
Are you saying you think there's anyone else at another school who could take it instead?
[ No way, that's his and Sejoon's battle. It couldn't be as much fun with anyone else, Minhwan is convinced of that much. ]
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Not that he's worried about that happening...But even if it did happen, he couldn't imagine things going any other way than they are now with Minhwan. It's weird how much of a normal everyday thing this has turned into for him- like he can't imagine going through the rest of school without battling for the top spot with the other guy. It'd just feel weird, wouldn't it...? Even though there were plenty of years without this rivalry before either of them ever met.
In a way...it's actually kind of weirdly comforting to here that, in the worst case scenario (worst case scenario to Sejoon meaning he gets kicked out of school for some reason), Minhwan would apparently still follow him on to the next school. It's one thing that Sejoon doesn't have to worry about losing...it's one thing that'll stay the same, no matter what he does. And he actually believes Minhwan would follow through on something like that- the guy's followed him in crazy enough ways so far...why would he stop there?]
What, so we'd just pick right up where we left off? Or...then again, who knows? Maybe you'll be trying to get number one back from me by then.
[For some reason, he can't stop himself from smiling while he's seeing Minhwan be all grinny like that. He knows very well that a pretty similar expression could still rile him up just as easily...but no matter whether Minhwan can or can't read the mood right now, he's not doing anything right now except making Sejoon feel good.
He laughs a little and leans over to give Minhwan's forehead another small, soft kiss...it just feels right for some reason, no matter how weird the thought of that is.]
I think if we're going to stay on the same path, we might as well stay in the same school too.
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Even with these new things between them right now today. Switching it up is only fun, so Minhwan welcomes even the soft kisses like the one Sejoon plants on his forehead, smiling like he isn't still wounded in the head from his fall earlier. ]
Do you like this school that much, Sejoonie?
[ Not that Minhwan dislikes this school. Sejoon is here, and his sister is, and his best friend is, and other fun people-- but he's less attached to things, has less trouble leaving things behind. Even if he went to another school, he could just contact all of those people outside of school. ]