Just sitting here, listening to Kiraki talking about her life at the Convent.. it's pretty nice. If not just since he likes knowing more about her, and that it makes things oddly calm for once (compared to the hustle and bustle of missions from the Church and trying to make sure his friends aren't about to shove each other off a rooftop). It's just them sitting here, holding hands - one of the few forms of physical contact he does think of, since it's just something they've been doing for so long, even if it has a different sort of feeling to it now. Even when they were kids and dragging each other around enthusiastically.. it feels so long since then.
But Kiraki is talking about her Messiah, and that's something he likes listening to as well. Because there's a kind of care in the way Kiraki speaks about her, a fondness, and it makes him smile. Both because he's glad she found someone to get along with, and because it's a reminder of how kind she can be. How much she cares when she cares about people. She's great.
.. except then the topic shifts, and his stomach feels like it's being squished together. ]
You saw..?
[ It's not that he minds that she didn't speak up. He can't blame her, he knows the rules people in their position have to obey. It's not what bothers him - it's the fact that she saw him.
She saw him standing there, no matter the weather. She saw him standing there, and Mamoru remembers he started tearing up quite a few times too. Because it was the only moment he could unload. Between not wanting to worry Takano at work and not wanting to worry Kaito at home, he never had time to mourn Kiraki. Those were the only moments since he thought no one was watching, that he wouldn't make anyone feel bad.
He thought wrong, apparently. ]
Ah.. so-- hnn. [ He remembers mid-apology (it comes out almost instinctively) that they promised to not say sorry anymore, even if it's already half come out. Mamoru tries to smile still, but there's something a little wry about it, even as he keeps looking at her. ] It must've looked pretty strange, huh..? I hope I didn't worry you too much.
no subject
Just sitting here, listening to Kiraki talking about her life at the Convent.. it's pretty nice. If not just since he likes knowing more about her, and that it makes things oddly calm for once (compared to the hustle and bustle of missions from the Church and trying to make sure his friends aren't about to shove each other off a rooftop). It's just them sitting here, holding hands - one of the few forms of physical contact he does think of, since it's just something they've been doing for so long, even if it has a different sort of feeling to it now. Even when they were kids and dragging each other around enthusiastically.. it feels so long since then.
But Kiraki is talking about her Messiah, and that's something he likes listening to as well. Because there's a kind of care in the way Kiraki speaks about her, a fondness, and it makes him smile. Both because he's glad she found someone to get along with, and because it's a reminder of how kind she can be. How much she cares when she cares about people. She's great.
.. except then the topic shifts, and his stomach feels like it's being squished together. ]
You saw..?
[ It's not that he minds that she didn't speak up. He can't blame her, he knows the rules people in their position have to obey. It's not what bothers him - it's the fact that she saw him.
She saw him standing there, no matter the weather. She saw him standing there, and Mamoru remembers he started tearing up quite a few times too. Because it was the only moment he could unload. Between not wanting to worry Takano at work and not wanting to worry Kaito at home, he never had time to mourn Kiraki. Those were the only moments since he thought no one was watching, that he wouldn't make anyone feel bad.
He thought wrong, apparently. ]
Ah.. so-- hnn. [ He remembers mid-apology (it comes out almost instinctively) that they promised to not say sorry anymore, even if it's already half come out. Mamoru tries to smile still, but there's something a little wry about it, even as he keeps looking at her. ] It must've looked pretty strange, huh..? I hope I didn't worry you too much.