[Elijah certainly doesn't mind anything about this...if he'd had any disdain about being mated to Agreas, he wouldn't bother keeping it hidden. In fact, he'd realized a long time ago that he wouldn't mind it, and nothing about the idea bothered him. It could've been as simple as that explanation- that he could tolerate it, and there was nothing more to it. Maybe it would've been easier that way too...or maybe not. But learning, and accepting the other implications behind those initial feelings of comfort- realizing it wasn't that simple-...doing that was a lot harder.
And of course he should've known Agreas would've asked him a question that shot straight to the heart of the matter. He's not surprised by it, no. But that won't make it any easier for him to know how to answer.
The short end of it...Elijah isn't good at this sort of thing.
It's true enough that he's painfully direct with...almost everything. But anything like this- anything that makes him feel vulnerable, or exposed... Unsurprisingly, it becomes much harder to speak his mind so plainly. Like all of his words dry up in his throat before they can even reach his mouth.
And this whole scenario here isn't quite so simple as Elijah just pining for Agreas on his own. It started out with the simple realization that Elijah couldn't get as close to another human being as he already was to Agreas. Not ever... plain and simple. And even if he'd wanted to try...it would take years, at the absolute least. From there...everything else started falling into place. To put it plainly- his attachment Agreas far outweighs his hate for alphas. Even to the point where he would've been completely willing to let Agreas take him, if he'd asked for it.
Elijah's eyes flicker down to Agreas's hand- the one that'd dropped away from his shoulder. It's almost funny how reserved he seems now, when he'd been so quick to press his hands all over Elijah the night before. But there's an instinctual pull there for him too...one that wants the soft touch against his shoulder to return again. He's always been the type to fight against his omega instincts after coming to resent them so much...except he's sure that this is something he would want- with or without the instincts attached.
He still doesn't move right away though...as much as he knows he owes Agreas an answer, it's not the sort of thing he can blurt out.
But when he looks back up to the other's eyes, and sees that spark of hope in them...it's enough to make him force out a small, but noticeable nod. As quiet as the gesture is, it still feels like it's made the world around them both go completely silent. A moment passes in that silence before he reaches down- letting all of his fingertips slide very, very softly underneath Agreas's hand...gliding over the other's palm, and then his fingers in turn. It's a gesture that's not forcing him to come back, but beckoning him to return instead.]
You are...my only exception.
[The only alpha he could never hate...the only one he could develop any sort of bond with...and the only person he'd ever let get this close to begin with.]
no subject
And of course he should've known Agreas would've asked him a question that shot straight to the heart of the matter. He's not surprised by it, no. But that won't make it any easier for him to know how to answer.
The short end of it...Elijah isn't good at this sort of thing.
It's true enough that he's painfully direct with...almost everything. But anything like this- anything that makes him feel vulnerable, or exposed... Unsurprisingly, it becomes much harder to speak his mind so plainly. Like all of his words dry up in his throat before they can even reach his mouth.
And this whole scenario here isn't quite so simple as Elijah just pining for Agreas on his own. It started out with the simple realization that Elijah couldn't get as close to another human being as he already was to Agreas. Not ever... plain and simple. And even if he'd wanted to try...it would take years, at the absolute least. From there...everything else started falling into place. To put it plainly- his attachment Agreas far outweighs his hate for alphas. Even to the point where he would've been completely willing to let Agreas take him, if he'd asked for it.
Elijah's eyes flicker down to Agreas's hand- the one that'd dropped away from his shoulder. It's almost funny how reserved he seems now, when he'd been so quick to press his hands all over Elijah the night before. But there's an instinctual pull there for him too...one that wants the soft touch against his shoulder to return again. He's always been the type to fight against his omega instincts after coming to resent them so much...except he's sure that this is something he would want- with or without the instincts attached.
He still doesn't move right away though...as much as he knows he owes Agreas an answer, it's not the sort of thing he can blurt out.
But when he looks back up to the other's eyes, and sees that spark of hope in them...it's enough to make him force out a small, but noticeable nod. As quiet as the gesture is, it still feels like it's made the world around them both go completely silent. A moment passes in that silence before he reaches down- letting all of his fingertips slide very, very softly underneath Agreas's hand...gliding over the other's palm, and then his fingers in turn. It's a gesture that's not forcing him to come back, but beckoning him to return instead.]
You are...my only exception.
[The only alpha he could never hate...the only one he could develop any sort of bond with...and the only person he'd ever let get this close to begin with.]