[Her breath caught in her throat for a moment as she continued to meet his gaze. He was still a little frightened and uncomfortable when she acted this way with him. It deeply perplexed her, as the only way she ever learned to deal with men was by using their sexual desires. Itsuki clearly had them, she could feel his desire growing against her leg just as she expected. But what she didn’t expect was how he clung to her and stammered, almost faltered.
And when he said the last words she almost gasped, but was honestly too shocked to react. He was telling her than she didn’t need to seduce him like this, she didn’t need to put up a show. She only had to be herself. (even when she still didn’t fully know who that was.) ]
I’m sorry I…I never mean to lie to you it’s just I…Seduction is one of the only ways I know how to deal with men…
[ Before she knew it, a few silent tears had leaked from her eyes and on to the pillow below her. She relaxed a way from him a little, letting her hips rest on the bed with her chest still pressed against him.]
But it’s real this time. I actually want you. And I’m sorry, if I act unlike myself because…I still don’t fully know who I am, this is all so new to me…
[She closed her eyes for a moment, squeezing a few more tears out.]
If you don’t actually want me like this, that’s fine. I’m sorry if I’m going too fast. I’m sorry…
[ She didn't even know what she was apologizing for anymore. She just held onto him tighter. She wanted him, this was so new for her. But normal people in relationships waited, right? He was young, he had never even kissed a girl before. And after learning that she used her beauty and charm as a means to an end, of course he'd be suspicious. And maybe she was just using him. She was lonely and had never had agency like this before. Maybe she was just toying with him, she didn't know. All these feelings were so new. But even so she knew that it hurt her to see him like this. It hurt to see him scared and uncertain. She wanted to reassure him, she wanted to protect him, she wanted to stay by his side.]
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And when he said the last words she almost gasped, but was honestly too shocked to react. He was telling her than she didn’t need to seduce him like this, she didn’t need to put up a show. She only had to be herself. (even when she still didn’t fully know who that was.) ]
I’m sorry I…I never mean to lie to you it’s just I…Seduction is one of the only ways I know how to deal with men…
[ Before she knew it, a few silent tears had leaked from her eyes and on to the pillow below her. She relaxed a way from him a little, letting her hips rest on the bed with her chest still pressed against him.]
But it’s real this time. I actually want you. And I’m sorry, if I act unlike myself because…I still don’t fully know who I am, this is all so new to me…
[She closed her eyes for a moment, squeezing a few more tears out.]
If you don’t actually want me like this, that’s fine. I’m sorry if I’m going too fast. I’m sorry…
[ She didn't even know what she was apologizing for anymore. She just held onto him tighter. She wanted him, this was so new for her. But normal people in relationships waited, right? He was young, he had never even kissed a girl before. And after learning that she used her beauty and charm as a means to an end, of course he'd be suspicious. And maybe she was just using him. She was lonely and had never had agency like this before. Maybe she was just toying with him, she didn't know. All these feelings were so new.
But even so she knew that it hurt her to see him like this. It hurt to see him scared and uncertain. She wanted to reassure him, she wanted to protect him, she wanted to stay by his side.]