ic; you can move me if you want to

[jinxings]

( let's say it's regular canon so before eiri shootings... please.. )

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[jinxings]

[ It's exactly at that moment that Haku realises how easy it might be to actually get rid of Eiri if he tried.

Because obviously his passive attempts at exaggerating his own personality - being airy about absolutely everything, making fun of Eiri while pretending he doesn't know what he's doing, covering the whole room in his trash and belongings so it feels like his room rather than one he shares with someone else - don't do anything to keep Eiri at a distance. No matter what he does, no matter how annoying he tries to be, Eiri still never really quits, despite his yelling about how he will. Instead he keeps going after him to yell at him more, he keeps coming back every single time.

But to see him so shocked and stunned at just him yelling his name.. It would probably be the easiest way to get rid of him. If he continued yelling, if he was cruel.. would Eiri then truly leave? It would be the best for both of them. Haku wouldn't have to endure yet another loss (although surely they would assign him a new Messiah and it would happen all over again), and Eiri wouldn't have to die, just like every single other Messiah that's slept in this room before with him.

There's another thing he's realising though as he looks down at Eiri. Not just how easy it would be to try and get rid of him this way, but.. also that a part of him turns and twists at the very idea of losing him. It's a selfish feeling, considering Haku knows that he's the jinx, that keeping Eiri with him like this will only kill him off sooner or later, that it's completely and utterly inevitable. But even so, he can't shake it off. As much as he wants Eiri to be able to leave him and live, he also wants him to stay here and not leave him alone. Because somewhere along the road, in the middle of all his attempts to piss him off, he grew attached to the short guy who yelled like he was two heads taller than he really is. The guy who never gave up on him, the one who fell perfectly into step with him during every mission. The guy who never really truly seemed to lose his innocence - for as down-to-business as he was during missions and for how little he'd hesitate at shooting every single target they had if it was needed, trusting Haku's instructions, Eiri had never lost that certain childishness and innocence about himself outside of it. He's emotional and naive and even now stares at him with wide, surprised eyes--

Really like a child.

For just a brief moment his grip on the other's shoulders tightens, and the look on his face is - for once - rather hard to read instead of just his usual one that says he's about to tease Eiri to hell and back. ]

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